You may be a self-handicapper and not know it

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“I didn’t have a chance to warm up.” “My left elbow is giving me trouble.” “I never play this hole well.” “I can’t putt on slow greens.” “You can’t get a decent lie in this grass.” “I haven’t played in three weeks; here goes nothing.”

These are typical examples of golfers engaging in “self-handicapping.” This is a psychological term for excuses, rationalizations or behaviors a person uses to protect their self-esteem and ego. Shrinks may call it a “face-saving device.” Excuses are an attempt to deflect responsibility and accountability for failures.

Most of us have seen the Carl’s Golfland ads on the Golf Channel where the voice repeats a dozen excuses why his play has gone sour. There are probably over a thousand excuses for golfers to choose from, and golfers invent new ones each week. Golfing self-handicappers always seem to have an excuse, so they are often viewed as “whiners.”

An equally unproductive reaction to perceived failure is to berate and demean yourself by thinking or saying “you idiot” or “how could I be so stupid” or “if I had a brain, that wouldn’t happen.” That falls under self-defeating and self-sabotaging, which is related to self-handicapping, but not the same.

There is an upside to blaming mishaps, mistakes and failures on outside forces. If we constantly blame and criticize ourselves for unfortunate blunders and outcomes, we may soon feel a downward spiral in our self-esteem, and may even experience symptoms of depression. Professional tour golfers are careful not to heap loads of blame on themselves, knowing full well that they need to remain positive even though things haven’t gone their way. Seeking external sources to blame (e.g. wind, noise, etc.) for occasional miscues or consequences serves as a useful shield against feelings of inadequacy, but it can be pitifully overdone.

There are two types of self-handicapping methods. The first involves making the task harder by placing obstacles in the way of performance, such as refusing to practice or showing up with a hangover. This is known as “behavioral handicapping.”

The second way people self-handicap is by coming up with justifications for their probable failures, so they can point to their excuses as reasons for why they fail. This is called “claimed” self-handicapping. Examples may be complaining of physical symptoms or “not playing well lately.” In the extreme, this may signal a full-blown personality disorder. In the workplace, we all know certain individuals who can’t seem to hold a job for very long, probably due to blaming everyone but themselves. The truth is, a dozen bosses can’t all be jackasses.

Some of the traits that golfing self-handicappers demonstrate include a generally negative attitude and thinking, a tendency to view oneself as a “victim” mostly of circumstance and being prone to come off as a “know-it-all” by virtue of eschewing golf lessons and friendly advice from accomplished golfers. Additionally, they may be extremely insecure and fearful of being unmasked as a fraud – this is known as the “imposter syndrome.” The vast amount of research on the subject reveals that males are the worse gender for self-handicapping.

If you feel that some of these descriptions and situations apply to you, you might consider asking a few of your close golfing friends and others for feedback about your attitude and behavior on the golf course. But be prepared for what you may be afraid to hear.

Golf is an activity where we are responsible for our own success and failures. It’s the only sport where we call penalties on ourselves where needed. In a way, self-handicapping is a form of self-cheating, as you don’t give yourself a fair chance.

Charlie Blanchard, Golf Doctor, opinion, sports

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